Feng Shui For Love

Feng Shui is a 6000-year-old practice and philosophy. Originating from China, with foundations from Taoism and Vastu Shastra.

Feng Shui is the philosophy that you can harmonize with the powers and energy of nature and bring this into your home or workspace to create an optimal environment for you to thrive in. 

Feng Shui literally translates to wind and water, very powerful forces, it can be very destructive or the perfect blend is like a beautiful day on the beach. 

If you believe that your environment influences your well-being, then this is no different!

Feng Shui can be highly personal, some take it seriously, others use it to enhance aesthetics incorporating it in decor or interior design, or you can use it to simply “feel good” in the space that you spend the most time in.

You can also use Feng Shui to anchor your goals in your environment. The subconscious mind is highly symbolic; meaning that you can remember symbols and images and its meaning more so that words or text. 

Symbolism plays a big role in Feng Shui.

How to Feng Shui for Love and Partnership

In Feng Shui for Love, this means pairs! 

Feng Shui for Love and Partnership, Earth element Feng shui

Feng Shui also is principled on the 5 elements (same as Traditional Chinese Medicine). That is Fire, Earth, Water, Wood, and Metal.

Earth is the element of love and partnership. Earth is grounded energy, the symbol for strong foundations, for soil, in which to plant and grow. Earth elements in Feng Shui is clay, terracotta, and stone.

Color psychology is also a big part of Feng Shui. All colors have their own frequency and vibration. All having a subconscious role in our moods and personal energy.

The colors for Love can be earthy colors as well as light pink, and warm neutrals.

Classic Feng Shui also uses the compass directions, accounting for the different energies of the planet. (The feeling of the sun setting in the west or the feeling for the rising sun in the east, the north winds or the south winds).

If you are more interested in Feng Shui, feel free to connect with me!

You can also visit my home page at www.ivymarielim.com and download your Feng Shui Bagua (the only Bagua you will ever need) as well as a Meditation to amplify prosperity starting in your home!

The Magnetic Love Method – A Transformative Self-Love Breakthrough Program to Attract the Love You Want

If you are fine with being single then this may not be for you….But if you can take a moment and go inside your heart of hearts, erase any pains from the past, make all the if only’s and what if’s disappear…Is there any inkling… any possibility at all, for you to be in a loving, enriching, healthy relationship?

If there is a whisper of yes — then please read on…

As a little girl, I had no role model of a healthy relationship. My father was an alcoholic, verbally abusive, mean to my mother, and physically abusive to me and my siblings.

He was also a womanizer, then turning around and accusing my mom of being jealous and paranoid. I prayed that my mom would leave him, but we lived humbly as it was and I now know that between cultural beliefs and financial strain, this wasn’t an option for her. Many, many days we went to bed with screaming and yelling and woke up to it as well.

My parents finally did separate after 33 years. It wasn’t only until I got into high school and started hanging around in friend’s homes that I realized that a husband and wife actually spoke nicely to each other.

My parents were very traditional from the Philippines and as I grew into a young adult, and started dating, the emphasis was for me to get married. That’s it. Get married. Not marry the right guy, not find a man who is responsible, ambitious, or caring. It was just – get married.

It was only very late in life, did I realize that I had a deep underlying belief, that I was not good enough and not worthy of anything good (I didn’t even know what “good” was in a relationship!)

Nonetheless, I dated any guy that paid any attention to me, and by 22 I was pregnant with a “nice” handsome, tall, guy. (I say tall, because my Dad did say marry someone tall actually, being Filipino we have the genetics to be short — this was his idea of marriage advice!?)

I was still in university at the time and soon after the birth of my daughter, her father succumbed to being a non-thriving pothead. At this time, I myself developed similar anger and rage inherited from my father. This served me somewhat, as I was angry enough at him to leave him.

I always left the door open to him and he never walked through to be a father. And so I raised my daughter as a sole support parent, a true single mom, with no physical or financial support from her father.

I did date here and there and got married when my daughter was 5 years old. The marriage barely lasted 2 years. Is it surprising that I attracted a man with anger issues? And again, I was angry enough to know that I was not going to live the rest of my life to man with the same rage as my father and divorced him.

Again I dated here and there, but this time I wanted to be very careful who I brought into her life. In turns out the majority of my dates didn’t last too long anyways – they would mostly break up with me or I would do something to cause that. (Can you see a pattern here!??)

By the time my daughter was 13, I was finally in a long-term relationship of just over 2 years! A good-looking, fit man, 10 years my senior, with a daughter 4 years older than mine, attending a US college on a soccer scholarship. (It appeared that I was a sucker for good looks and with no substance!)

At his suggestion, we finally moved in together. So I packed up my house and we got ourselves a modern condo, the perfect place for my daughter, in the city hub with transit at our door.

Within 3 months of living together, he left his email open while “he traveled to visit his daughter at Eastern Michigan University” for the weekend.

Then I discovered he had been cheating on me for the last 3 months, all the while saying he was taking weekend trips to see his daughter. I was to find out that he had been cheating on me sporadically throughout our entire relationship. All the red flags had been there and I’d been too naive, feeble, and manipulated to listen to my instincts.  

This completely broke me. I was 37 years old, I felt like the biggest failure. It was one of the darkest times in my life, I felt humiliated, guilty, ashamed, every negative emotion ran over me like a freight train. I not only failed me but I failed my daughter (again). How could I have allowed this to happen to me? What did she have that I didn’t? (Apparently, a lot because I even made a list!) What was wrong with me? A black cloud stayed over me.

A girlfriend finally intervened and said to me, “Ivy you need to look at why you keep attracting men like this into your life?” We had met at an intensive personal development program and also at this time the wildly popular “Law of Attraction” movie was circulating.

Thoughtful single woman looks out the window home, self care, personal growth.

This question cut me deep.

But I took it very seriously.

And went to work, deep inner work.

All my friends and family, said for me to be alone, take a break from men, work on myself – and they meant it with all kindness.

I took out all the tools that I had accumulated from all the self-development programs, workshops, courses, books, and videos that I had accumulated over the years, and implemented them all in my life. Within 4 weeks, the cloud started to lift. And I felt this overwhelming sense of love for myself, that I didn’t know could be possible. I became keenly aware that I did not love or respect myself before. This brought on inspiration and healing for me.

I thought, if I deny myself a relationship then he wins. If I deny myself the love that I truly deserve than it is only I, that loses out.

I then joyfully went back to online dating, this time, with a strict protocol in place, and in 2 weeks I met him, the ONE. Upon our second date we took down our profiles and a child and a blended family later its been 12 years. And together we have built a prosperous, ever-evolving, passionate, life together – more than I could ever dream. 

The mess of life transformed me and now it’s my passion to help other women become their best self. To guide other women to renewal and inspiration.

Ivy is a certified Master NLP Practitioner, Life Coach, and Certifed Peak Performance Coach (with Distinction) with the Flow Genome Project – a world leader in the science of Flow States and Peak Performance.

Also a Trainer of Hypnotherapy and has expertise in the Energy Healing Arts – as a Feng Shui Consultant and Pranic Healing Practitioner.

How to find a high value man

The Magnetic Love Method is a 7-week program, designed for the single woman with a full life. With 40 easy-to-do lessons, practices, and guides, in addition, there are 7 weekly live 1-hour coaching sessions with me, to assist you in your transformation with grace and ease. (Recorded in case you miss it)

The process is simple and seamless, designed so that you enrich and enhance the best of you. You do not need to sacrifice or give up anything.

You’ll become empowered as you align with your inner desires, overcome hidden obstacles, develop more courage and confidence that overflows into your financial, professional life, and have an increase in physical vitality, joy, and vibrancy.

In this program you will:

> You will release, inner resistance and underlying barriers to love

> Radically let go of any ties, old hurts, and cynicism about past relationships.

> Renew your belief that a kind, heart-centered, and soulful love does exist. Be truly liberated from the past!

> Discover the secrets of becoming a magnet for joy, beauty, and all things true, that overflows in all areas of your life.

> Attract the right person for you – a partner who enhances and enriches the life that you already love.

> Become empowered as you wake up to your true worthiness, your deservedness

> Elevate your potential to love and be loved.

> Finally end all self-sabotaging or disruptive patterns and expectations that lead to disappointment.

> Trust your intuition and get attuned to your personal energy, to uplift you and anyone that you encounter.

> Stay true to your high standards and be in total integrity with your deepest values.

> Joyfully attract the high-value man that complements you, and desires similar growth and partnership.

Welcome miracles and garner the potential for unprecedented happiness and a fulfilled future.

This is my signature program upon which my life’s work and calling are built around. I am committed to guiding women to live a holistic, complete life, that is true to their most inner desires. You don’t have to be alone – unless this what truly makes you happy!

If you have an inkling of desire to be in a fruitful, prosperous, partnership, with someone who loves you deeply, cares for you, and accepts you for all that you are, someone to share the high’s and low’s of life with –  then this is for you.

What is this worth to you?

I believe with all my being it is so very possible, it happened to me at a time when I was very broken and so confused.

I believe it can happen for you too, it starts with a simple intention. I hope you will explore it.

Let down your guard for just a moment, and open up yourself again to possibility.

I take a stand for all that is possible for you now — not for what happened to you or who you were in the past. 

Choose this program if you have sincere intentions of amplifying your self-love and you’re ready to let go of doubt and skepticism about having an enriching partnership in the future.

And you are ready to live in total vitality and to honor yourself to the fullest.

The Magnetic Love Method consists of these 4 Pillars:

Awareness: Uncover core wounds and unfulfilled needs, ingrained from childhood, cultural beliefs, or past events. Disintegrate subconscious programming and conditioning blocking you from love. Understanding how you operate on a neuro-physiological level, gives you a clear vision of how and why you make decisions. 

Alignment: Gain clarity on your most treasured values, and align to that in a way that makes you whole, complete, and fully accepted. Embody the relationship you desire. Its not about perfection, its about a consistent, easy progression to step into the life you want, and welcome the relationship you want.

Attention: Training on an intuitive and energetic level, to gain a deep-seated self-trust, and quiet courage. Being attuned to your inner knowing, gives you flow in your actions and frees your time up for the things and people that matter most in your life. 

Amplify: Radiate, magnetize and amplify your joy, passion, and life path – very succinctly — so that you are irresistible and others are drawn to you.

Contact me if you have any questions or for enrollment details!

The next program begins on October 20th, 2020! Book a call now.

Group size is limited to only 8 women/those that identify as women.

Book me here: https://calendly.com/ivyflowfusion/discover

www.ivymarielim.com

 

I Meditated to Forgive My Cheating Boyfriend, Instead My Gut Went Haywire

I heard Meditation was good for clearing your mind so I thought I could use it for forgiveness too.

I wanted to forgive him, I still loved him and I believed him when he told me that his affair was an elaborate scheme to get her to sign over the property that she was co-signed on during the tenure of their former relationship together.

He promised me he would do anything to get my trust back. His computer and his phone would be unlocked so could I look at it and check-in at any time. He even changed his phone number.

I discovered he had been cheating on me when he left his computer on. He told “her” that he was in Florida trying to start up a business with his best friends there and that’s why he couldn’t see her regularly. He had been seeing her one weekend a month for 3 months, and most of their contact was via email and I read them all. All the “I miss our cuddling” (what? He hated cuddling, he couldn’t fall asleep like that) he couldn’t “wait to ravage her body again”. All the while, I thought he was visiting his 19-year-old daughter Laura (name has been changed), at Michigan State University, where she was on an athletic scholarship, it was just a 4-hour drive away. I had asked him why he didn’t take me with him and he chastised me saying that he has a right to spend time alone with his daughter (even though she and I got along so well)

He agreed we could do a counseling session. An intensive weekend session based on the “Imago Theory”, the theory whereby one finds a partner based on their expectations or unfulfilled needs they had as a child. I thought maybe now I could understand, why he held me to such “high standards” why he wanted me to dress a certain way in front of friends and be the perfect hostess. (Apparently, his mother liked all these formalities too, and his Dad loved her for that.)

I had made a list of all the reasons why his “she”, was better than me. Highlighted the things I could improve and remained dismal at the things I could not change. I had a child and which naturally, comes with some freedom limitations of being a mother, I couldn’t party as much. I could get even more fit. She had way larger breast than I had. She was white, I was ethnic (shouldn’t I have one up being of the exotic nature?) No, she was white, and had blue eyes, how could I compete. Apparently she was a clean freak (like his mother), okay I guess I could be a little neater.

I stilled loved him. How do you stop loving someone overnight?  And he begged me to stay. And I was intent on forgiving him so I began meditating every day, two times a day, for an hour.

A month or so, went by and things were going really well, it was like we were dating again and he was pulling out all the stops. He was more romantic and attentive than ever. She did provide her signature and so he promptly put the sordid property up for sale. The tenants moved out with no issues and I helped him clean the place and get it ready for the market. It was in a prime location in the Beach area of Toronto and it sold quickly. The last night, before the new owners would take possession, we went out to a candlelight dinner downtown and he wanted to pass by there. He wanted to make love to me there on the last night that he would be the official owner. We thought it would a nice way to retire the evening, the final seal to end this phase of his life and be rid of this piece of property that could no longer bind him to “her”.  

I also thought it was a sort of nice “fuck you” to her too.  I look back now and I think of my own character. That I would find this behavior acceptable –  that he had to forge being in love with her and have sex with her so she could sign over papers to him. I guess it was cheaper than offering her money. And don’t they do this kind of stuff on television shows all the time? You know, handsome real estate mogul, wines and dines a lonely businesswoman, and makes high stake deals in the bedrooms of fancy hotels, then discards her with a vengeful smirk after she signs over the paperwork? 

This was the night a strange feeling in my body started. It was like a churning in my gut. The next day the churning grew stronger and moved up to my upper chest. I could not ignore it. Whenever he would go into the bathroom, I would check his phone, and I check his computer, no contact with her.

I start doubting myself. Maybe I couldn’t forgive him. Yet I knew that if I was to stay in this relationship I had to learn to forgive him, let it go and not be resentful towards him. Besides he would never put up with my resentment. He always had a great way of turning the spotlight back on me, shining a light on my own insecurities. He’s told me that I pressured him. I questioned myself — did I ask too much? We had been together for 2 years, we were not a “young couple” I was 36 and he was 14 years my senior having just turned 50. Shouldn’t we already know what we want in a relationship? Wasn’t 2 years of dating enough to know? Besides, it was his idea to move in together and get a cute condo near the subway line so that it would also make commuting easy for my 13-year-old daughter, and we wouldn’t have to worry about driving her around all the time!

So I closed my eyes tight, pulled the blanket up closer to my mouth so I could feel my breath against it, put on my earphones and meditated, focusing on my breath. Scanning my body and trying to let all my thoughts go….

When meditating, I would also do visualization work. I would bring up a vibrant picture in my head of the two of us together, visiting Florida, where his best friends lived. I could see the palm trees and the restaurant patios. But today and for the next 2 days, I could see nothing. Blank. I kept my eyes shut and tried again to bring up the picture, the colors, the warmth of the Florida sun and nothing. For the life of me, I couldn’t conjure up any pictures. My visuals came up black.  As my gut and chest churned.

On day 3, the churning was so strong in my body that it woke me up at 3 am. I took a peek in bed at him and he was fast asleep.

I quietly grabbed his phone and scrolled through the recent call list of the number dials and numbers received. I looked at the texts and there was nothing suspicious there what so ever.

And then I went to his computer, which was located in the den and opened up his email.

I scrolled through the Inbox folder, scrolled the Deleted items, of which there was quite a bit, he liked to keep a clean inbox (unlike me) but nothing out of the ordinary.

Then I went into the Sent items folder. And I scrolled down and down, all of today’s, all of the yesterdays, nothing and then upon the Sent items – 3 days ago, something caught my eye.

I saw his name attached to a brand new email. It seemed he had created a new email address that he had not given to me.

He copied his original email and this new email to his daughter’s soccer coach in Michigan “Steve, this is my new email, moving forward please use this email to contact me, regarding Laura.” [email protected] (not much different from his original email) [email protected]

I had to get into that new email. I opened up a new window and went to Hotmail.com, I went to the Login and typed his new mail in the box. And now I needed the password.

I put my hands on the keyboard, closed my eyes, allowed myself to go into a meditative state, taking 3 long deep breath, after a few moments, my fingers typed in a 6 letter word. I hit enter.

And I was in.

I guessed the correct password, on the first try.

I looked at the inbox and there she was, he had begun contacting her 3 days ago. The thread of emails began with him apologizing to her and her being angry that she didn’t hear from him for a month.

I started shaking but it was more of a quick, vibrational feeling throughout my body, not the same as when I first found out. I realized the churning that I had started feeling 3 days ago was my body trying to tell me something, and this was it, this is what you call gut instinct. Intuition, something that never had before (or listened to before) obviously or maybe I wouldn’t keep finding myself in these horrible relationships with men.

I woke him up, woke him right the fuck out of the bed at 3:30 am in the morning and told him to get out. This time he didn’t argue, he quietly packed a big, duffle bag and started towards the door.

He stopped and turned back to me and looked at me, with some sadness in his golden-brown eyes. And said, “the next guy you date, try not to pressure him too much”

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I screamed at him, “You are a fucking, pathological liar, you need to have your head checked out, and you need to get the fuck out now.” And that was it, it was over and I knew in my gut we were done.

I kept my meditation practice going, it would just be another 6 weeks and another feeling overwhelmed my body, this time it was the feeling of self-love. I began loving myself, accepting and forgiving myself. It was a crazy kind of love for me, that I had never experienced before.

 

It wasn’t too long after that, that I met my husband and fast forward today it’s been 11 years. I now teach the profound, sometimes unknown side effects of meditation, self-love and a sharpened intuition. 

Did I Fail My Gifted Child? Parenting the Gifted Child

Did I Fail My Gifted Child? What to do when your child thinks outside of the box.

Savannah was my first daughter, I had her when I was barely 22 years while a student at the University of Toronto and working part-time. As my mom told me back then, “you have a good life, why would you do this?” Yes, life was good, I was traveling and of course, partying like most 22-year olds. My boyfriend then wanted to have her, we were in puppy love and I was blindly raised, to just meet a man and get married. I decided to keep her, thinking we would live happily ever after. Subsequently, he ended up dropping out of the relationship and fatherhood altogether – as he fell prey to life in the party lane and unfortunate addictions, its too bad because he was a really, nice guy, who couldn’t kick the addiction. Perhaps that’s another blog, for another day.

It was a healthy, easy pregnancy, I didn’t grow a big belly until the last trimester, which at first was alarming to my O.B. so he monitored my progression carefully. During one of her ultrasounds – the doctor said “10 fingers, 10 toes” and that’s when it really hit me – oh there are children who can be born without this? And that’s when I started quietly praying each night, that I would have a normal, healthy child. By the time she was 2, her father all but dropped out of our lives, no money or physical support was to come for the rest of her life.

Leaving me to in the treacherous waters of real, single motherhood, no co-parenting, to child support cheques, no alternating weekends of babysitting. Back then there were not many online resources at all for raising children, there was no Mom meet up groups, or online forums for new moms. The mall and the neighborhood park were my mom outlets. None of my friends were having children, there was certainly no wiki-how- to raise your child or Instagram comparison posts to other super-moms.

All I knew, was that I didn’t have to overly childproof my house, I would tell Savannah not to touch the outlets and she didn’t. I could sit her up on the edge of a table and she knew not to crawl to the edge and fall off. I didn’t even have baby gates on the stairs, she somehow knew not to climb it or go near it when we were upstairs. Once she started crawling, she automatically would crawl down backward, safely finding herself at the bottom. We could sit at a restaurant table and she would quietly just observe other patrons, around us fascinated and still. When it came time to potty training, she quickly followed her older cousins lead and was out of diapers almost overnight and loving her big girl panty’s. Basically, all these little childhood drama’s and phases came and went easily for us. When I did speak to other moms with toddlers and heard of their potty training and childproofing challenges I couldn’t empathize. I didn’t get it.

By the time she was in grade 1 she no longer wanted me to pick out her clothes, putting her outfits together, right down to her socks and the accessories in her hair. By grade 2 she was layering, accessories, necklaces, and bracelets with confidence and an eye for style.

By grade 5 was when the “testing” began in her school. And she was “labeled” with giftedness. In that, her cognitive and comprehension skills were advanced than the other kids her age. Still, it took years for me to realize that yes despite, disliking being “labeled” maybe she was indeed “gifted.” By the age of 10, it was clear that she was a creative artist. She had an eye for colours, painting, photography, fashion and anything creative.

There happened to be 3 other girls in the class also with giftedness, in different capacities. Once a week they were bussed to the gifted program at another school. I succinctly remember her looking at her IEP (Individual Education Plan) during report card time and seeing the list of those with IEP’s. Special Needs children, blind, physically or mentally disabled. And she was wide-eyed and in a bit of shock exclaiming, “I’m special needs!! I’m in the same category as blind kids?!!” It never occurred to me that my child was special needs either. I wish I had known Dr. Shefali back then, my now model for being a Conscious parent (and Human being).

I was raised very old school, like leather belt whip type of old school. I wasn’t born in Canada. The types of discipline I was raised with was spanking, and other methodologies that would be considered illegal, and child abuse in this new age of child rearing. I knew that was not how I wanted to raise this child. My parents especially my father, suddenly had a change of heart with this first grandchild of his. He coddled her and babied her for years and would never ever consider raising a hand to her, but then again Savannah was an easy-going understanding child.

I wholly encouraged and supported her to explore her creativeness and artistic abilities, the gifted program she was in was wonderful for her learn through imagination, improvisation, and creativity. But I also thought she had to try to fit in the box, for her to be able to succeed in the “real world”. She had to respect teachers (or did she have to?), there were rules to follow, deadlines to meet, tests to pass and grades to make.

I didn’t realize that her concept of time was not the same as most “normal” people. She had difficulty completing assignments on time, couldn’t focus on the material that needed to be learned to pass a test. However, whenever she did complete the assignments (she liked) she would do so with AAA grades. The teachers were baffled at how sometimes she could get A’s and other times she was just an incomplete. If only I knew then, what I knew now. My child didn’t have the capacity to learn the way it was being taught in a general classroom setting. She was easily bored and distracted – which I often misinterpreted as lack of focus and discipline.

Oh I could have really used Dr. Shefali ? It was not until the last year of high school that a special teacher sat us down and told us that Savannah was not going to fit in this school’s system or the way it was taught. There was a school in the west end of downtown Toronto called the “Student School” there, the students had full say in their curriculum, got to pick which subjects were taught and weren’t graded on exams, but on contribution and altruistic real-world projects of their choosing. This one year of high school for Savannah changed her life and open my eyes. She enjoyed going to school, even though the commute was longer with extra buses to take. There was no pressure to get there on time, and you didn’t get scolded for not wearing the exact, uniform (there were no uniforms there of course). There was no box she needed to fit in and the threat of failing or of not graduating high school was no longer imminent.

What I know now about learning styles, that I didn’t know then: Everyone learns differently, everyone processes information differently The most basic categories of these can be learning best through kinesthetic (by doing), audio (by hearing) visual (by seeing) and auditory digital (likes the details and things broke down) Or any combination of these. And some kids just need extra special attention to process information and learn. I get that it must be very difficult for teachers to teach all these styles to many times, 20 plus kids. And it takes a very special teacher to recognize and understand to the special learning needs of a child who otherwise seems “normal”.

What I know as a more conscious parent now, was that my struggles, worries, conflicts with my expectations (or what I thought were THE expectations) of a society or culture. We’re required to put our children through a systemic, old, curriculum and not at all designed to nurture the child to be the unique, expression of who they truly are as human beings. Then add to that my expectations of what I perceived were the definition of success and successful parenting.

Who’s definition of successful parenting was going by? Too many times I tried to get her to meet the expectations of this bubble we live in. Be sharply on time, dress a specific way, get good grades. My daughter had not a care in the world to meet these expectations and was loving her time in school.

In the end, all the spats we had, was all for nothing. She ended up graduating from high school, being accepted in the Ontario College of Art and Design University. Then she found it too boring after her second year. All the while I was gritting my teeth somewhat because a part of me wanted her to have the piece of paper with letters behind it and the other part of me knowing that it’s certainly not the ultimate definition of success. Now my daughter is happily pursuing her career in music, and still busting out the funky styles, she’s very self-aware, compassionate, helpful and living unapologetically to life on her “gifted” terms. And certainly, more authentically comfortable and free in spirit. Now, where’s the Diploma for that?

Why Haven’t You Tried Meditating?

It’s our second year owning a quaint waterfront cottage, and so far we’ve experience 2 unprecedented weather phenomenon – the first year it was high flood waters and this year it was wicked wind storms.
Both times our waterfront was left unharmed, thank God for these wonderful blessings.
My other cottage neighbors weren’t as lucky and were left to repair extensive water damage and fallen trees
I joked that it was all the meditating I do at the dock every weekend, though part of me really believes that this true.
I do believe that meditation is the harbinger of divine energy and that you can ask to be divinely protected, despite knowing that we’re really never in control, I still live a little lighter having faith that I can at least ask. And hope that whatever does come my I can find the blessings in it.
So before I digress, on my subject line which is asking why haven’t you started meditating? There’s so much scientific research on the benefits of practicing meditation (or “mindfulness”, dare I use the word meditation as it may sound too “spiritual”.) It’s even on the cover of TIMES magazine.

Here I thought Meditation was already, very much infused in the mainstream. So when I met my lovely, cottage neighbor and now good friend, and she told me she had never meditated before, I must admit, I was a little shocked.
I have a fondness for her and especially for the fact that she is a beekeeper (she has 2 hives on her front porch). She is also a tree hugger and a nature lover enthusiast like myself. In my eyes, she is already so connected with Mother Nature that I was shocked that she didn’t already harness this divine connection with herself, through meditation.
Meditation has been a huge part of my daily routine for the last 10 years, and I talk about it so much, that I just assume anyone that comes close to and stays in my energy field also meditates.
So when I said to, “Hey let’s meditate and go for a run, this weekend,” and she said, “I am game for either, even though I have never meditated” It struck me that yes, not all nature loving people meditate, Ivy.
If you haven’t started meditating yet, I am most certainly wondering why?
Since each of us is different, I then can only speak about the benefits I discovered due to having a meditation practice.
I became calmer. This was a big deal for me. I grew up with a father who was an alcoholic, abusive and had a bad temper. (All is forgiven and redeemed now by the way), My child was volatile, there was a lot of screaming, anger, and rage. I came to communicate like this as well, I too had a quick temper, and I easily raise my voice, whenever I express frustration, impatience, and anger. In fact, I was an all-out road-rager.
Never hesitating to roll down the window to shout out at the perpetrator. Besides maturity, meditation gave me a filter to buffer my quick temper. Soon my temper would only be reserved for extremely irate moments.
Perhaps you don’t have anywhere near a background like this and you are a super calm, stoic, person already – well then you likely won’t need this benefit of meditation.
Another benefit of meditation that you may not see in the “scientific research” side of things, is that you improve your intuition. Good old gut instinct! I can’t explain it and neither has science really, but intuition is real! I don’t consider myself a medium of any sort, but meditation gave me the ability to have this 6th sense, to really differentiate between doubt and gut instinct. This alone was worth all the time and effort put I have put into meditation. Learning to trust your gut saves you time in decision making, and the ability to accept and be at peace with your decisions for better or for worse.
The last benefit that I am going to explain in this blog, that I know you may not find in the scientific research is that feeling of One-ness. I know right, like what the heck is that? This is the reason why I was shocked that my cottage neighbor didn’t meditate seeing that she was a nature lover.
What does meditation have to do with being a nature lover? When I am in nature I feel so good, like I belong there (because we really do). I breathe easier, and I feel a sense of peace. And yes, this feeling is what I also get out of meditation.
Well, the above is just a few of the reason I meditate. And if you are not a nature lover, then I still think meditation is for you. In the meantime, check out my future blog, to get updates on my new meditation spot — my neighbor’s dock!

How to Use the Energy of this Full Moon and Lunar Eclipse

A Lunar Eclipse is like 10 Full Moons amplified?!

That’s enough to make the sheep’s howl!  Keeping reading on how to harness this full moon 10x amplification, illuminate your gifts and how NOT to howl and growl over the next few days or so.

If you know me at all, then you know that I’m an all out Full Moon gazer, sun set seeker, and tree hugger.

My oldest daughter knows this all too well – it’s become habit, that whenever we go outside at night we always look for the moon.

Her first tattoo, was of the tree of life and a crescent —- moon.

 

The phenomon of the earth, sun and moon all perfectly aligning never fails to be an exciting event, for even the most seasoned of stargazers.

This Total Lunar Eclipse will be the longest one of the century.

Western Astrologers and Zodiac sign seekers are having a great time predicting what this all means and that fact the moon is the house of Aquarius.

In Feng Shui, a portion of its philosophy also follows astrology, namely Chinese Astrology.

My point here is that — although different school’s  – they both share the same belief in the power of the cosmos.

After all we are truly made up of the same stuff as the stars.

Whatever your belief is, this astronomic event is symbolic of transformation, alignment and connectedness.

We forget, as we mull around our daily lives, that we here on Earth are truly  a part (not apart) of the grand Universe out there.  And even the composition of our physical bodies are the same as the stars.

“For decades, science popularizers have said humans are made of stardust, and now, a new survey of 150,000 stars shows just how true the old cliché is: Humans and their galaxy have about 97 percent of the same kind of atoms, and the elements of life appear to be more prevalent toward the galaxy’s center, the research found.” Humans Really Are Made of Stardust, and a New Study Proves It. By Elizabeth Howell, Space.com Contributor

There is also the well documented, “Overview Effect”, It’s the mental shift that astronauts experience, when they are awe-struck at the realization, that the Earth truly is a part of a large whole.

                                                                                                            Astronaut Tracy Caldwell-Dyson looking back at the Earth from the International Space Station.

So when astronomic events like the Century’s longest Lunar Eclipse occurs ,then it’s a great time to pay attention, and appreciate who you are in this Universe.

And come on, there’s something really special when the Earth, Sun and Moon line up for a full 143 minutes!

Spiritual sages across all philosophies speak about the energy during a Full Moon. I love using this time to amplify and elevate my own energy. And to release and amplify my intentions.

Your attention energizes and intentions transform, clarify your intentions , surrender them to the silence and allow the universe to the work out the details.

Here are things you can do over the next few days while we bask under the light of the full moon and lunar eclipse.

  1. Keep your emotions tipped on the feel good side and then do your affirmations.If you are feeling down or neutral, get yourself in a happy place . Listen to music, recall happy memories, play with children or pets, get outside and admire nature’s beauty all around you. Once you are feeling really good, say or write down your affirmations and intentions.
  2. Add RED! – This is also the a Blood Full Moon, so add RED! Write your above affirmations and intentions, in red ink and put them in a red envelope.  Get red flowers for your home this week. It’s the longest Blood Moon, the next one isn’t until 2123!

@BHG

3. Surrender – Some people think this is some form of being a pacifist. It is not “giving up”. Well, it is actually  — it is giving up your worries, your anxieties and your need to control everything. This is a very courageous thing to do – TRUST.  Trust that the Universe is always working in your favour. 

4. Be a Conscious Co-creator. Whether you are conscious of it or not, your energy field, is constantly putting out signals, and in turn pick up signals.  You may as be deliberate in what signals you are putting out there. What radio station do you want to tune into?  Do you want to tune into the stations of abundance, prosperity, love and health. Or do you want to tune into the stations of fear, lack, cyncisim and shortage?  Remember you are a source of electricity and magnetism and yes you have the power to adjust to  what it is you want to attract.

5. Take a Salt bath or salt shower. Salt as many healing, sanitizing properties, if you are feeling or stuck or someone’s low energy got to you – then salt is a great mental, physical and spiritual way to cleanse yourself of any negative energy. Put salt in bath water or rub it onto your body as you shower

6. De-Clutter – it doesn’t have to be a major overhaul, but clearing your space (or even your inbox) leaves you with a clean and clear space to create more of what you want, and allow good things to come. Whether is a cupboard,  a shelf, your car, or desk, do some de-cluttering (with joy and gratitude!) today.

7. Bless and Energize your home. Most people only remember to do this when they first move in, they celebrate with a house warming or ask someone to come in and do a blessing. But you can do this anytime yourself and its so important to do this on a regular basis. Or at least at every full moon 😉 😉

Go to this link for my FREE Home Blessing Meditation:

https://ivymarielim.com/free-home-blessing-meditation/

8. Meditate! Yes, you didn’t think I would miss that one, did you.  If you are not a regular meditator like I am, it’s beneficial to meditate 3 days before and 3 days after a full moon. But of course, daily meditation has its well-founded benefits at any time.

So enjoy being a part of this historical event, it took a Century to have one this long.  Finally, release any limiting beliefs you have been carrying with you this far.  There’s something special when the Sun, Moon and Earth align, and you too can be a part of this. Use this as the opportunity to align yourself with who you truly are, and align yourself with all that you know, you are deserving of.

Love,

Ivy

xoxo

How to Move From Overwhelm to Inner-Peace

Yes, I know what you’re thinking, because if you REALLY are in overwhelm you probably can’t even fathom what inner peace is.
“I am Overwhelm queen, no one can be as overwhelmed as I am”– said ALL overwhelmed people everywhere.
Seriously though, I model my business on walking the talk, so yes, I am an overwhelm expert and it ain’t always pretty.

If you don’t know me, then you may not know that I have a beautiful, blended, modern-ish, multi-cultural, sandwich generation and special needs family. A true His, Hers and Ours family.
It consists of our seven-year-old daughter, his special needs daughter, and my ailing 78-year-old mama.
At least that’s who lives with us full time under our roof. He also has a daughter in a nearby town in University, and I have a break-out artist daughter in downtown Toronto. (Don’t worry I won’t quiz you later).

We both have full time businesses, and 2nd businesses — like, who is doing just one business these days?

 

These days we all wear the “Hi, My Name is Busy” like a name badge at a networking party.
Ask anyone, “How are you?” and they will give you the default answer, “Busy!” as the new, “Fine thanks!”
We are constantly on the brink of overwhelm, in fact when we’re not overwhelmed, we’re bored.

Okay joking aside, overwhelm is not fun. It leads to anxiety, stress, sleepless nights and nodding off at the wheel – serious sh*t. And I drew the line at the nodding off, when my husband admitted he did that few times. Research from the CDC showed that more than a third of drivers get less than seven hours of sleep per day, so it looks like he’s not the only — even scarier.

CHECK YOURSELF before you WREAK HAVOC on everyone else

Overwhelm also hits you at the most inopportune times, like when you kid decides to cute around when she has 5 minutes to catch the school bus. What might otherwise be a comic chuckle, ends up with you snapping at her or worst yet, an all out shouting frenzy.

Overwhelm, zaps the joy out of being pleasantly present to life’s precious fleeting, fun, moments.

Everything is in hyper lapse, so you can get things done. Eventually leaving you drowning in your to-do list, making you feel inadequate, not good enough and even helpless.
For me, my overwhelm makes me want to give up everything, sell off all my worldly possessions, to buy a Sea-Doo and rent it by the hour, on some beach in the South Pacific. Yaasss life goals.

But for now, I work through my “I chose to do this” to-do list.

 

PRACTICAL TIPS AND SPIRITUAL RITUALS TO DEAL WITH OVERWHELM

Here are some practical tips and spiritual rituals that have helped me deal with overwhelm.

1. Learn to say no. I’m a social bug, I love being with people, I love everything social, from meditation groups to masterminds to mix and mingle parties. I can’t do it all, see my kids and adult with my husband, a few times a week. So, I carefully plan and space out, outings, and sometimes even RSVP last minute if there’s availability,  should the time slot open up.

It took me a long time to get used to saying no, I had all types of friends ask me to do things, because they could also count on me to say yes. I realized that it was coming from a scarcity consciousness, that if I don’t accept the invite, another won’t come, or I would’ve missed an opportunity. Stop buying into that, it’s a great marketing tool right — “limited quantity, get it now while supplies last.”

Know, that you will always find yourself in the right place at the right time, no matter how many times you opt out. And there’ll always be an opportunity and in the rare case, where there really was a limited supply, well then, it happily went to someone else and it wasn’t for you.

2. Delegate. Trust that someone can do as good, or almost as good a job that you can. Even if it’s your husband making a hair bun for your budding ballerina.

3. Chunk it down. This is when you take the big task and start with a small step. And be happy with whatever progress you make. Effort is progress, just keep on it, one small chunk at a time.

4. Be a time bender. Remember that most things will take 2x the amount of time,  that you plan.
Accept that your best work, may take more time and that unless it’s a life or death situation, chances are, it will be okay to not make your deadline.

5. Meditate or start meditating. I cannot tell you how much this has kept me grounded. I received a text from a girlfriend, who was having trouble with her partner’s ex-wife, and this sweet friend of mine wanted to “punch her in the face” and then said to me, “No wonder you do so much spiritual work!” Yup, I have ex-wife woes too.

Meditation is the best way to re-fuel your energetic and emotional reserves, by far, there’s a reason this practice has been around in both the religious and non-religious, for thousands of years and now it’s backed by science, and it starts with the next point….

6. Breath work. Don’t forget to breathe. A former fitness client of mine, and high-level executive, told me that she enjoyed our workouts together, because it was the only time in her day, she was able to breathe deeply. (You know inhale at the exertion and exhale on the return).

The simple, free, flow, breathing, is more than enough to start with. Breathing in through your nose, expanding your lungs to the abdomen (diaphragm) then exhale it all out through your mouth. Before you know it, you will be meditating. Your breathing changes with every emotion you have. Master your breath and you will master your life.

7. Channel your energy somewhere. Energy, especially stress energy needs to be released from your body, physically and energetically. We all know the perils of harbouring toxic, stress energy in your body.

I like to do the etheric “cutting cords”. It’s a like a karate chop, around your body, especially around your torso area (solar plexus chakra) and declare, “Cutting away, and disintegrating all negative energies that no longer serve me, dissolve it out into the universe!” Chop! Chop!

Here you are setting a powerful intention, to free yourself of negative energy. Here you are marrying the Physical with the Non-physical, powerful stuff.

8. Get grounded. Get outside, and barefoot in the ground if possible, if not then sit or lean against your favorite tree. As you do this, give quiet thanks to Mother Earth for her rejuvenating powers.

This also works as well, with your face to the sun, or even to the moon. Riding the gratitude stream is the one of the most powerful waves you can surf on.

9. Talk it out. Preferably to someone, who is a really good listener, opinions and suggestions aren’t needed, you just need the opportunity to again release and get it out of your head.

If you don’t already, talk to God, or to your Higher-Self, your Divine-self,  or your Un-Conscious Mind, whatever you choose to call it. Here is a short prayer from author and spiritual teacher Marianne Williamson that may help:
“Dear God (Source, Divine …)
I give this time of quiet to You.
Please dissolve my thoughts of stress and fear
And deliver me to the inner place
Where all is peace and love.
Amen.”
(Deep Breath Here)

10. Journal. If you haven’t started the habit of journaling, then sticky notes work great too. Again, another method to get the energy of overwhelm out of your mind and body. Take notes as to why you’ve chosen to do what you do. Are you doing work that is leading with service or leading with the heart? Is there a shift you can make in your perception of the work you do, that serves the highest intentions, for your clients, co-workers or project? Remember to end your Journal input with a note of gratitude.

YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL.

I really do think you can have it all, it just may not come as fast as you wanted it to.
But rest assured, you only need to take one step at time, and on the good days, feel free to lunge over two.

The universe was made from a mass of what looked like total chaos, only to precisely come together after billions of years, and be intimately intertwined with each other,  then go on to birth the 8.7 millions of species, inhabiting the Earth today. We’re made of this same chaotic star dust, so never underestimate, the possibilities that we can create, by taking it one deep exhale at a time.

If you want more details on these tips or rituals, or anything else you are curious about, do feel free to connect with me, after all, if you want anything done, give it to a busy person.